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Steve Lunetta: The king of hypocrisy

Right About Now

Posted: June 28, 2009 9:27 p.m.
Updated: June 29, 2009 4:55 a.m.
For one column, I turn Dem-o-crat. I know it is difficult to accept, but I'm going to sit with Gary Horton at the Koffee Klatch and kibitz about another failed Republican.

What will I have? Maybe a double-mocha frappacino with some chocolate sprinkles. It will probably cost 8 bucks.

Doesn't matter. I'll win a bet and share my winnings with all my friends and save the last eight dollars for myself. As any self-respecting socialist would do.

Then, I'll get down to the serious business of skewering those stinkin' conservatives.

While the world mourns the loss of the morally compromised King of Pop, Michael Jackson, I mourn the loss of the morally corrupt King of Hypocrisy, Mark Sanford, the embattled Republican governor of South Carolina.

Before Jackson croaked at UCLA, the story about Sanford was top of the news. As the story slowly unfolded, it grew stranger and more bizarre by the moment.

Last Thursday, Sanford disappeared from the State House in Columbia and told his aides that he was going to take a little four-day hike along the Appalachian Trail to clear some cobwebs out of his head.

He didn't bother to tell the Lieutenant Governor, Andre Bauer, that he was leaving. No one was in charge of South Carolina while he was gone.

What if North Carolina had attacked? What if South Carolina seceded again? Sanford's odd disappearance was certainly a disservice to the people of South Carolina.

Later, it was revealed that he flew to Argentina to obtain a more "exotic" perspective and unwind.

With the lies unraveling fast-and-furious and a group of determined investigative reporters at his heels, it was soon revealed that our wayward governor had been allegedly playing around with an Argentine mistress named Maria Shapur.

To make matters even worse, a newspaper got a hold of his private e-mails and published the more salacious sections of his adulterous diatribes.

Apparently, one of their favorite games was "naughty gaucho and the wayward confederate."

Mark Sanford made his political career based on family values that played well to his largely conservative Christian base in South Carolina.

While opposing faith-based license plate frames, he was quoted as saying, "It is my personal view that the largest proclamation of one's faith ought to be in how one lives his life."

So, what does this latest sequence of events say about Sanford's faith? He is condemned by his own words and relegated to the heap of lying-sack politicians.

He was also a staunch conservative who railed against big government and pork-barrel spending.

He went so far as to bring pigs into the statehouse to protest the big-spending ways of the state legislature. Maybe the legislators could parade a bunch of hookers through Sanford's office.

It also appears that Sanford used state funds for his little spree down in Argentina. What are we going to find out next? When do the lies stop?

Besides the clear betrayal of his wife, family, party and people, no one can trust a single word this man says. Each statement is hedged or nuanced - there is no integrity left.

Quit, Sanford. You are an embarrassment to the great state of South Carolina and to the Republican Party. Why don't you become a Democrat? I'll bet they'd welcome you with open arms.

(This is where Gary would spill his triple-latte-hot-fudge-ginkgo coffee on me. I had just uttered a heresy at the Koffee Klatch.)
Simply put, if you are a Republican legislator and you are having an extra-marital affair, please resign now.

It is just a matter of time before you are found out. You will embarrass yourself, your family, your church and your party.

And, two-bit opinion columnists like me will have a field day ridiculing your moral lapse. Correction - let's make that your "moral character flaw" that disqualifies you from public service.

Ironically, I have come to accept these moral gaps from the Democrats. The list is long and colorful - Gary Condit (intern chaser), William Jefferson (cold cash), William Jefferson Clinton (unlawful use of a cigar), and Dan Rostenkowski (remember him? He stole from the House postal service and won re-election in his home district). The list goes on.

When a Democrat is caught red-handed, my response is, "Eh, typical," and I don't give it a second thought. I don't hold Democrats to high moral standards. But I hold Republicans to them.

We Republicans must hold our public officials to higher moral standards.

Honesty, integrity and accountability must be the guiding principles for any Republican politician. We must not accept anything less. Not today, not ever.

Steve Lunetta is a Santa Clarita resident. His column reflects his own views and not necessarily those of The Signal. "Right About Now" runs Mondays in The Signal.


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