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Steve Lunetta: The Republican mess in the Santa Clarita Valley (part 2)

Posted: May 28, 2012 1:55 a.m.
Updated: May 28, 2012 1:55 a.m.

"Calm down, Earl! It's 2 a.m. in the morning," I pleaded. Uncle Earl is always a bit on the crabby side, but dumping my last phone call on him pushed him over the edge.

Last week, I got a phone call from Deep Carl, an operative in the Obama administration who detailed the plan for the destruction of the GOP in the SCV. He appears to be succeeding. I immediately called my uncle to get his take.

"This is just insane! These morally repugnant scuzzrats that are running things need to go! I've never heard of so many dirty tricks, underhanded shenanigans and tomfoolery in all my life," Earl railed.

I tried to calm him. "Earl, how do we even know these things are true? Maybe these are the machinations of a couple of disgruntled rabble-rousers."

"Not even close, my boy. I've heard these same stories from a number of good Republicans in the valley. Most, if not all, unsolicited. Why, I've even seen a dirty trick just this week."

"What do you mean, Earl?" I queried.

"An email that stated it was ‘Your Official Republican Voter Guide' was sent out to the SCV Republican database. Nestled within the standard endorsements was the candidate slate for the 38th Assembly District Republican Central Committee that was merely the opinion of the writer of the email! There was nothing official about it!" Uncle Earl was really fired up.

He went on. "To make matters worse, the endorsement list was written by one of the candidates for the 38th ADRCC. In other words, the guy endorsed himself and then wrapped it up as ‘official'! What a dirty trick."

I countered, "Isn't it the right of a person to endorse who they want?"

"Of course, my boy, but it can't be done under the cover of office. That is a morally reprehensible act. It's abuse of power. Unfortunately, it is also par for the course and is consistent with the history of Republican politics in the SCV. It's time to make a change!"

"OK, Earl," I interjected. "But what else have you seen that is a problem?"

"In this valley, many political things are conducted under the cover of confidentiality and secrecy. We need to stop these practices and be transparent and aboveboard.

"As my mother used to say, ‘If you would be embarrassed to have others know what you are doing, then you probably should not be doing it.' We need to elect honest people to the Republican Central Committee that will be honest and not hide things." Earl was beginning to make sense.

He continued, "Of course, this problem is not unique to the SCV. The recent hooker scandal with the Secret Service in Colombia and the General Services Administration Las Vegas party scandal are similar in nature.

"People in power, arrogant that no one will catch them and operating behind a cloak of secrecy, abuse the power that we, the people, have given them."

"But, Earl, aren't the folks in the Central Committee merely working to make a better SCV?"

"At what cost? Is it acceptable to compromise core values of truth, honesty and integrity to gain a desired outcome? Do the ends justify the means? Of course not. Somewhere along the line, Republican senior leadership in this valley forgot that.

"Everyone knows that there is a machine the operates in this valley. The Dems have known this for years, since they have often been the targets of it. Unfortunately, this machine is now controlled by people of questionable morals and ethics who have turned this machine on Republicans.

"They disenfranchise tea partiers and Ron Paul supporters. They insult little old ladies. They bully and intimidate. The machine is now evil."

The truth was now becoming clear to me. Had I been wrong all of these years? Was my party, the party of Reagan, wrong? No, it wasn't. But the leaders in charge are the issue.

Deep Carl and Uncle Earl were beginning to convince me that something needs to be changed.

"Earl, what can we do?"

"Son, it is now time to turn on the power of the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy to fight the rot and decay that is in our party. You must use the VRWC to restore decency to the GOP SCV."

I am convinced. Next week, we will release the "Official VRWC Republican Voter Guide" for use on Election Day. Throw away all other guides that pretend to be OFFICIAL. Stay tuned for Part 3.

Steve Lunetta is a resident of Santa Clarita and cannot be bought off in any way. Except with cheeseburgers. He can be reached at



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